Putting the pieces together

I am not a puzzler by any stretch of the imagination.  I might BE a puzzle to some people, but I do not enjoy puzzling.  I am a very task oriented person and if I cannot figure that thing out in short order, you might as well put it right back into the box and have it put out with the recycling.  No, I do not like puzzles.  For me, solving a puzzle is a waste of time.  Why put something together, only to take it all apart so someone else has to put it back together?!?!?!  Some people are good at puzzles.  They have patience.  They can visualize the end picture.  My husband likes to puzzle - he is patient.  I do not like to puzzle - I am not. . . . . . . .    Well, you get the picture.

Recently I started thinking about all the things God brings into our lives at various times.  And how I just want to try and make sense of it all.  Why did my husband have to have his accident 20 years ago?  Why did my brother have to go through a traumatic fall and sustain a massive head injury?  Why does my sister have to constantly deal with pain from scoliosis?  Why did I have to be accepted for a job I dreamed of only to have me crippled by anxiety and fear and lose that dream job?  Why did/do I struggle with depression?  Why did my husband and I have to go through the separation last fall?  WHY? WHY? WHY?  Some of these things I struggle with I can definitely see the good things that have come out of them.  Some, not so much.  Some things in my life I still shake my head at and say GOD I DON'T GET IT.

As I've been trying to make sense of things, I've realized that we may never get that answer.  At least not here on earth.  We may never receive the answer to our why questions.  That's a difficult pill for me to swallow since I am a person who likes to make sense of things.  I'm a practical person.  I like to know the answer to the question why.  And I think for me it all comes down to the fact that we are not in control:  God is.  And He knows what the end result will be.

I've started to look at the things that happen in my life as little puzzle pieces.  (I know. . . I think I'm a bit morbid since I don't like puzzles, but hear me out!)  Every thing, little or big is a puzzle piece.  Each event, good or bad, is a puzzle piece that fits into my puzzle of life.  God knows what that end picture is but I don't have a clue.  God didn't provide me with the picture on the box.  HOWEVER, I am having to trust that He is my puzzle maker and is putting down the pictures to create an amazing picture.  Sometimes I see how the pieces fit together.  (They must be the edge pieces because those really are the only pieces that make sense to me!!!)  Other times, there are a few pieces that happen that don't seem to fit into my puzzle of life anywhere.  In fact, some of those pieces seem like they should belong in a completely different puzzle!!! Actually, I'd like to put them in someone else's box so I don't have to go through them!!!

But, if I trust that God, as my puzzle maker, knows what picture He is building with my life, I will trust that each piece serves a purpose.  That, while I can't make sense of some (okay A LOT!!!) of the pieces in my puzzle, God knows what that end picture is going to look like.  I am going to trust Him as my ultimate Puzzle Maker!  I'm not going to try to make some of the pieces fit on my own. Pressing, and pushing to make them fit is never going to work.  I'm also not going to try to "trim" some of the pieces to better suit me.  I'm going to leave the puzzle making up to Him.  I'm going to trust that He has me in His hands.  That He is going to complete my puzzle some day and look at it and say "YES!  That's exactly the picture I had in mind for her!"

My Coca Cola puzzle that I have hanging on my wall is a 2000 piece puzzle that I did years before we had children.  You will notice that it was done, glued down onto cardboard, put under glass and framed (by my dear husband) - so that it never has to be done again.  (Okay, so I never have to redo it!!!)  It was done once and it turned out perfectly.  In my human little mind, I kind of think that's the way God might look at us once our puzzles of life are all completed.  He might look at our puzzle and say, "yes, despite all those pieces that didn't always seem to fit, or didn't seem to belong. . . THIS is what I had planned for this puzzle to look like."  I'm glad that God knows the end result of our lives.  I am glad that God knows in advance what our puzzle is going to look like and knows exactly the pieces we need to complete the perfect picture.  After all, God created the puzzle, so He knows which pieces are needed to create the masterpiece.

I am thankful that He has my puzzle in His control!!!!