Dear Neil

Dear Neil,

First and fore most I need to say, that I cannot believe you are gone, and I miss you so much.

When you were here in August, I was, and am so thankful for the time we had with you. . . . BUT. . . WOW. . . .you were a great actor! Let me explain. . . . I know Wendy saw right through those times of pain and anguish, but I want to say thank you to you for giving our family a wonderful time.  Thank you for pushing through the pain and sharing your heart with us.  I believe beyond a shadow of a doubt, you were giving us a gift no one could ever give us by fighting the pain in your body, to give us YOU.  Thank you for pouring into Taylor & Peyton and showing Jesus to them.  You have touched them so much through that visit. They will never forget those moments!

Thank you for the time you put up with me taking pictures of you and Wendy.  Being able to capture your love together was an incredible gift for me, and I will always treasure those moments at K.R. Barkman Park.  I know you were in pain.  And I know it was tough to try to smile through the pain and to give us the gift of the pictures, but I want you to know how much I treasure them right now, and how honored I feel that you let me take them.  I know being on display was not your favorite thing!

Second of all, I want to say thank you for loving my sister, and for putting up with me and the rest of us.  When you and Wendy first got together, I was cynical at best.  I had grown up with so many spiritual misconceptions, but I remember so clearly being at Red Rock and getting Wendy’s call asking me what I would think if you and she got married.  I told her it didn’t matter what I thought, but I told her that when she married you, she had to be 100% confident that you were the one for her and that she would never question whether God was blessing your marriage.  She told me she was 100% sure that you were the one for her, and for me? That’s all it took.  YOU WERE HER GUY!  So, thank you for loving her so faithfully all these years.



Thank you for putting up with our Langendoen-isms.  (I could say crap, but really, is that a nice thing to say?  I know you’d sit there with a bit of a smirk on your face – or a snorting laugh - and say nothing right now - but boy would that mind be a’whirlin!!!) But you put up with us.  You loved us. Because Wendy loved us.  I am so thankful for all those precious moments you gave to Wendy, and for all those moments you added to our family.

Neil, you weren’t perfect - (none of us are . . .despite the fact that us Langendoen's seem to think we are. . . . ) But YOU were perfect for WENDY for 26 years.  And I am so sad that she doesn’t have you in person anymore.  That we don’t have you anymore.

I have this picture of you sitting up there in Heaven with Keith’s dad chatting it up about the going’s on in the life of Langendoens.  And comparing notes from what you both knew.  I think about Jonny sitting there, correcting you both telling you the way it “really” was.  I can’t believe the three of you are together.  But I am glad.  I’m glad you are all there together.   I never would have thought that we would go from not having anyone close to us die, to having 3 of you there together in the matter of 6 weeks.  It’s so crazy.  I don’t know why God chose to take the 3 of you so close together.  But I do know it gives me so much comfort knowing you are all together with Jesus.

I cannot wait to be there with you.  Neil, please, please give Jonny a huge hug from me – (he’ll be awkward, but just do it 😊 ) and for sure, tell (Keith’s) Dad how much we think of him and love and miss him.  And know that we will do our utmost to take care of Wendy, even though we are so far away.  We’ll make sure your kids do too!  I know they love her. . . not as much as you, but almost as deeply.  We are so glad that you shared them with her.  What a gift they are to her.  To us!!  We will love Jesse too, and remind him often how much you love him and what a gift he is to you.  And how much you will be waiting for all of them. . . for all of us. . . .

I get that you will know this, but we’re heading there after Christmas. We will miss you so much, being there without your person.  But not more than Wendy, and the rest of your kids/grandkids.  I am so thankful Wendy has them to love on her, and care for her, and to carry on a piece of you in them.


Neil, you took in our Langendoen family without a second thought.  And I for one, am so thankful for all you have done for us.  (You got my Dad on a FREAKING MOTORBIKE for crying out loud!!!)  I love you and miss you.  And wish you were here, but find such comfort knowing you are with Jesus - pain, cancer, worry free – worshipping the One who you loved the most.

I wish we could be at your funeral and share all our great memories with those there.  But you know our hearts.  And you know how we feel.

I know that Wendy’s saying is “I LOVE YOU NEIL WARD!” but I do too.  You are missed so incredibly much!!!

I know God said to you, “Well done, Neil Ward!!! YOU have been a good, and a faithful servant. Come!  Sit beside me!”





Good bye dear brother.  Till we see you again. . . . . .