And here it is. . . the winding down of an old year. The saying good-bye to the past. To 2019. Most years I’ve been excited to say good-bye to the old. And in some respects, I am this year too.
The New Year represents a clean slate. A new start. The hope for better days. And that’s always why I have anticipated a new year.
This year, it comes with mixed emotions. 2019 and was a tough year in so many ways, but a great year as well. We got to celebrate Taylor’s graduation. She got her driver’s license. Peyton turned 15 and moved on to bigger and more exciting job opportunities through the summer. I taught my largest group of students ever – 60! Keith started at a different position at the credit union and won a trip which brought us to Las Vegas & Los Angeles. We made changes to the inside of our home. We saw God answer so many prayers in ways we didn’t believe possible.But. . . .
. . . we also experienced some deep losses and watch some family members walk through the deepest darkest losses imaginable. We experienced how God has sustained us and them through these losses. We experienced the love, prayer and thoughtful gifts from friends who have carried us through these deaths and difficult times.
And so 2020 is bittersweet. 2020 will be the first whole year without Jonny, Dad (Keith’s) and Neil. 2020 will be an entire year without those pieces of our hearts here on earth. 2020 will be an entire year without them. But it also comes with the knowledge that with each passing day, we are one day closer to seeing them, and joining them in the presence of Jesus. 2020 is hard to imagine without them. It’s hard to imagine family adjusting to life without their son/their brother. Their Dad. Her husband. But just like we’ve gotten through the last three months, I know God will sustain us. I know God will be there through the grief and through the sunshine.
I don’t know what 2020 holds for you or for me. But I know the God who holds 2020! I know that God is eagerly waiting for each one of us to come to know Him. I pray for my family members that aren’t following God. I pray that 2020 will be the year they are drawn to Him. I pray that 2020 will be the year we are all brave enough to share Jesus with others. That we can conquer the fears that stop us from sharing the Truth. As I think about the loves we lost this year, I cannot help but be grateful for the knowledge that the 3 people God took from our families are all with Him. I know that didn’t need to be the case. I know we have family members who wouldn’t have walked with Jesus. So, my prayer for each and every one of us is that this becomes the year that we get brave enough to speak Jesus to those around us. That our family members (and friends) that don’t know Jesus as their Saviour will look at us and be drawn to Him. That they will hear our words, and see our actions and say, “I want to follow THAT Jesus!” When I think about my family that doesn’t know Jesus, it can send me into fear and anxiety knowing that if it had been them that died this year, they wouldn’t be spending eternity with Jesus. But I also know that Jesus took those to Himself that were ready. And that they are waiting there for me when I get there.
So, I wish you joy, peace and a sense of God’s presence and direction as you head into 2020. May you seek a deeper relationship with Him that causes you to be closer to Him than ever before.
